It’s okay to not be okay. Life is not linear. There isn’t one path or one way. Sometimes you are stuck. Sometimes you don’t know where to go next. Sometimes you don’t like Monday’s. Sometimes everything you worked for is a total mess and you have to start all over again. Sometimes you get fired. Sometimes you break up with the guy who couldn’t commit. Sometimes, no matter how many miles you run, your love for alcohol and fries will perturb you from losing those 3 inches off your waist. Sometimes your best friend moves away. And then another one does. Sometimes, your parent’s house is full so you can’t move back home. And despite it all, you take a shower, you get dressed, and you put on that brave face and you coat it with a smile.
You know that everything will be okay because everyone keeps telling you that it will be okay. That this too shall pass. That what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.
Stop it. Seriously stop it. You can let that tear roll down your face. You can feel your body tingle. You can see the goose bumps. You can run and get a tissue. You have permission to wallow. You do. Because right now it might not feel likes it’s all okay. Right now, you might be going through that moment in life that will change you. It will determine your character. It will determine who you become.
Let me just be clear. Your circumstances are not permanent.
Breaking up with a guy you love hurts. And Ben & Jerry’s isn’t going to help.
Losing your job, it hurts. Booking a one-way trip isn’t going to solve it, though you can still travel alone and take advantage.
Getting the body of your dreams isn’t easy. No matter how many miles you run or how many kale salads you eat or how many health apps you try.
It takes a lot to be an adult. To pay your bills. To do work with integrity while your coworkers are on Tinder. To save. To count your blessings. And, yes, you, the girl down on her luck, the girl who feels so deep in the tunnel that she can’t see the light, yes, darling you, have many blessings.
But I want you to take this moment and realize that it’s okay to not be okay. It’s okay to feel a little taken aback. A little less confident. A little tarnished. A little unwanted.
It’s not easy to rebuild your life. To find a new job. A new man. A new best friend. To carve out a new lifestyle.
So, as I write this, my tears have finally dried on my face, but the computer screen is still blurry.
You have permission to curl in a ball, grab your blanket, and have a moment. You don’t always have to be strong. You just have to know that you can’t stay in bed and think that all your problems are going to be solved by ignoring them.
Tonight you can cry. Tomorrow night you can cry. But in the morning, or maybe two weeks later you’ll realize that you can’t keep crying. You have to get up and keep going. You’re an amazing person. And one setback. Five setbacks. Ten failed relationships. A bad job. An undefined waist will not define the rest of your life. You’ve got this. You are stronger than you think you are. But right now, it’s okay to not be okay.